According to statistics from 2010, 67% of women are working moms. I know I am not trailblazing the path for working moms who are trying to do “it all.” I would love to be able to do it all, but I just can’t. I would love to be a stellar friend, co-worker, girlfriend, daughter AND mom, but many times, I feel like I am mediocre at best.
Even having said that, here are some things that define my life simply because I am trying to find that delicate balance of being a working mom, a friend, a daughter, a girlfriend and the best mom I can be to my 6.5 year old!
Quality time with friends
This really was a staple for me with my inner circle of friends. We would do last minute Starbucks runs, last minute movie thing at midnight or just hanging out at someone’s house catching up. Those days are long gone. Now, I do the Starbucks drive-thru, get myself my coffee, snag a “bread with nuts” for the little one (Banana bread) and head off to gymnastics or Tae Kwon Do.
For a decade or so prior to becoming a mom, I was blessed to be able to travel a lot. Now this isn’t to brag, but I really enjoyed being able to come and go as I pleased. I’m not married and have a great job where I accrue a lot of vacation each year, so… I was able to see the world. Now… well, now, I do “family/kid based” vacations. We have been able to go to Legoland, on a couple of Disney Cruises and Hawaii (all activities in Hawaii were based around what he would like to do).
These are really now reserved for when he is sick. No one likes to see the school’s front desk number show up on the caller ID. We know that, for the most part, can only mean trouble!
I feel like I know more about Austin & Ally, Tenkai Knights, Justice League, Teen Titans Go, Wild Krats and Phineas and Ferb. While I don’t allow a lot of TV, clearly, he watches enough. My shows that I “had” to watch has sort of fallen by the wayside. By the time I catch up on the DVR, it’s really late in the season or I am just too tired to bother.
This lovely, very missed pastime is a tough one. With a first grader who is learning to read, we focus on enhancing his skills and not mine. I miss you reading—really, I do.
Gone are the days of “catching up” on my rest on Saturdays. The 6.5 year old is up by 6 AM seven days a week, no matter what time he goes to bed. And that sucks!
I feel guilty about working. I feel guilty about not working. I feel guilty when I feed him Pizza 3 nights in a row for dinner. I feel guilty when I lie (well not totally guilty) about the smoothie that I made that is basically all vegetables to make sure he gets that nutrition in his body. I feel guilty about lying that the ice cream truck only plays music when it’s empty. I feel guilty.
Yeah, my smart phone/iPad used to be filled with all sorts of wonderful Apps that I loved. Now, some of them are solely for the kid!
This, now, always takes place during my lunch hour now. I have my list ready to go and I get it done within about 20 minutes. Dragging him to the store week in and week out just wasn’t great for either one of us!
My selfie game has stepped it up since I became a mom! I take pictures of everything. I KNOW that my friends are probably tired of seeing all his cute faces, us at random activities, first day of school shenanigans and the like. But that’s what I do—take lots and lots of pictures of my little one!
So… while my life has shifted, I try to find a balance between being a mom and not being simply K’s Mom! It’s definitely a journey and I am figuring it out everyday. Some days are better than others. And some days are just that…days.